Vulnerability – On Failing and Falling

Failing and Falling

I am afraid of failing and falling.

There is too much talk about about showing up, about being strong and courageous but there is little talk on the power of failure, discomfort, falling and hurting.

I am a strong advocate of showing up but I have been so silent on the power of failing and falling. Showing up is only a piece of the puzzle. To complete it, we must embrace failing and falling.

True vulnerability is seen in the willingness to show up despite uncertainties and the readiness to embrace failure and falling when it comes around.

The process of navigating through failures and falls has a lot to teach us as the process of showing up.

We must learn to recognize the power therein and more importantly, we must learn to lean in to it despite the hurt.

A lot of us are running away from failing. Yes, it hurts but it is in this hurt that our courage is put to test and our values are strenthened.

The paradox of this is that you cannot show up and not fail. You do not have an option. They walk side by side.

We need to stop pretending to ourselves. We need to stop the busy work that we use to cover up our shame, failure, weakness and hurt.

It is killing us – our joy, spirit, creativity, potential. Aren’t you tired of being afraid? Aren’t you tired of fighting for your self worth?

I am tired and I know you are too because it is exhausting.

Deep down, you want to be very brave. You want to show up. You want to make things happen.

So, be brave.

Yes, the love of your life might leave you.
Your boss might sack you.
The album might not sell.
Nobody might read your work
Your business might not scale

But it would not stop you from owning your story. You know why? Because it is in these struggles that we find ourselves. That we test our limits.

We would do this by acknowledging that failure hurts real bad and that it imposes some crazy fear on us. This is what embracing failure means.

Let’s stop glamourizing failure and let’s start acknowledging and embracing failure and the pains that come with it.

Let us learn to deal with the fear, the hurt, the fall, the shame. Let us learn to stand back up.

Let us own up to our failures by being vulnerable.

“I am really hurting, I need someone to talk to”
“I did bad in my exams, I need some support”
“Our relationship did not work out and I feel so bad”

I want you to feel your hurt and pain rather than transfer it. I want you to learn to navigate through your emotions instead of working it out on others.

Until we learn to do this, there is no wholehearted living.

This is about you and how to handle failing and falling.

Lesson Learnt from Brene Brown